


something rich and strange

by neonheartbeat



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Anal Sex, Belly Rubs, Dirty Talk, Double Penetration, F/M, Human/Monster Romance, Kylo Ren Has Two Penises, Masturbation, Monsterfucking, Monsters, Naga Kylo Ren, Oviposition, Past Abuse, Praise Kink, Rey & Rose Tico Friendship, Size Kink, Snakes, Social Issues, Weird Biology, pregnancy mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-13 08:41:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29399220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neonheartbeat/pseuds/neonheartbeat
Summary: A solid employee at Full Services Monster Mess, Rey's used to almost anything-- but when a strange client gives the business a call one winter morning, she gets to handle far more than she expected.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey & Rose Tico, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 80
Kudos: 266





	something rich and strange

**Author's Note:**

> YEET. Mind the tags.

The ice on the sidewalks was so slippery that Rey almost fell twice trying to walk into work: once as she stepped out of the taxi, reeking of cigarette smoke, and once as she passed right under the neon sign that read  _ FULL SERVICES MONSTER MESS.  _ The S in Service was flickering on and off rapidly. Someone should probably fix it, since it had been like that since July and it was now the middle of December, but that wasn’t her job.

“Hi, Jannah,” she called out to the receptionist, who had a receiver tucked under her chin, a massive Tervis tumbler of hot coffee on the desk in front of her, both hands on her keyboard, and a colorfully patterned headscarf knotted around her head. She waved at Rey and continued on with her phone conversation.

“Yes, sir, I can tell you’re upset, but at the time of service we got  _ all _ the blood out of your chaise lounge, and you didn’t express any dissatisfaction with the—uh-uh, you are  _ not _ going to pull that on one me. Are you sure these spots aren’t from a more recent feeding?  _ Absolutely _ sure?”

Rey hid a grin and slid into her cubicle, setting her bag down and unwinding her scarf. There weren’t any jobs lined up in her queue as she checked her page on the company calendar, which she was kind of thankful for— last week, she’d been put on a werewolf cleanup job, and while the poor guy had been absolutely sweet and apologetic about the mess and tipped enough to buy everyone dinner, she’d still found clumps of matted fur in her socks and hair days after.  _ Well, time enough to answer some incoming calls, _ she thought, and settled her headset on, plugging her phone into the network and waiting for it to connect.

“Hi, Rey!” said Rose Tico, leaning over the top of the cubicle wall that separated them. One of her earpieces was off, one was in her ear. “Oh, my gosh, I’m so sorry you missed all the fun yesterday. We had a mermaid call. Her water was out and she was, like, panicking. We had to bring in our forty-gallon tank. And then it turned out she was a tropical mermaid, not an arctic one, and we had to heat the water in the back of the van while the utilities company came. Totally nuts.”

“Well, no wonder she was freaking out about the water being out, she could have frozen,” said Rey, absently tapping in her access code. “Next Sunday I’ll be sure to stick around.”

“Pay’s extra. You totally should. And Finn said on Saturday morning a centaur called and wanted help getting a rock out of his back hoof, so they had to call in a farrier. It’s been crazy all weekend.”

“Really? Ugh. We should crosstrain for that kind of stuff, I keep telling management.” Rey sighed. “Even, like, the super obscure situations. If a yeti or someone calls, we have absolutely zero hair removal kits for something that big.”

“I know, but you know they won’t pay for that.” Rose gave her a look and popped her other earbud in. “See you for lunch?”

“Sure,” said Rey, and mock saluted before settling in. A call was already waiting on her first line, and she picked it up. “Full Service Monster Mess, if you can make it we can handle it. I’m Rey, how can I help you today?” The other person on the line was breathing. Just breathing, short and heavy, almost panting, and Rey rolled her eyes. Perverts  _ always _ called in, and she couldn’t hang up by company policy— but really, it was eight in the fucking morning! She pitched her voice into the unsexiest thing she could muster: a brusque, low bark. “Sir—or ma’am? If you can’t hear me or don’t answer, I’m going to have to ask you to redial, do you understand?"

_ “I’m… sorry,”  _ came the voice on the other end of the line, and Rey frowned. It was definitely a male voice, deep and almost reverberating, gravelly.  _ “You said… Rey?” _

“Yes, sir, that’s my name.” Maybe this guy had anxiety about being on the phone? “Can I help you with something? You’ve called a cleaning service for creature messes?”

_ “Yes,” _ he said, haltingly.  _ “S-sorry. I’m…shedding. I need. Help.” _ He sucked in breaths between his words as if he was falling asleep, and Rey frowned: this was strange. Shedding? Nothing she couldn’t handle on her own. She had a stocked and loaded kit with wire brushes, soft brushes, combs, a vacuum, and an N95 mask. What else could she need?

“Okay, that’s not a problem. What’s your address, sir?”

_ “I’m at… twelve hundred three… Maple Street. Unit… unit four hundred four.” _ He sounded super,  _ super _ out of it, like he was drugged or something.  _ “It’s… c-cold. No… heat…” _

“No heat? You don’t have  _ any _ heat?” Rey tugged over a legal pad and scribbled down the address. “It’s twenty-three degrees outside. Sir, if you’re shedding your undercoat and don’t have heat, I advise you to try and stay warm until I get there, okay?” This could shape up to be a medical emergency if she didn’t get there in time: hypothermia was nothing to sneeze at, human or non-human.

_ “You’re… coming?” _

He sounded so  _ stunned, _ as if he’d never expected someone to actually respond to his call. Rey felt awful. “Yes, ‘course I am. Maple— that’s only five blocks from here. I’ll run, fast as I can. Promise. I’m bringing my gear and— and a space heater.” There were usually about four of them in the lockers, signed out and in for cleanup jobs along with the dehumidifiers and humidifiers. She could snag the last one, since she knew the other three were already checked out. “Okay? I’m coming. Try to stay warm.”

_ “Th-thank you,” _ he managed, and with a click, the line died. Rey ripped off her headset and unplugged her phone from the hotline, then turned over the top of the cubicle. 

“Rose! I’m running out on an emergency job, I’ll call you when I get there, yeah?”

“Sure!” mouthed Rose, flashing her a thumbs-up. As Rey hurried for the equipment room, keys in hand, she could hear her talking. “No, ma’am, I don’t know what you should use on a sore throat from too much wailing… yes, warm salt water works fine for humans— of course it’ll work for a banshee. This line’s really for mess removal, though— you could maybe call the general hospital for more advice?”

*

Cold winter air bit at Rey’s cheeks as she jogged down the sidewalk. Her company backpack jostled on her parka-covered shoulders, bouncing up and down heavily, and her grippy, rubber-sole winter boots crunched through ice. “Excuse me,” she panted, dodging past people. Maple Street, Maple Street. Her lungs ached from pulling in freezing air.  _ God, I hope I get there in time. I jinxed myself, I told Rose what if a yeti called… we don’t have big enough hair removal kits… _ It couldn’t be a werewolf, because usually any werewolf furry enough to be shedding couldn’t actually talk over the phone.  _ What am I actually getting myself into? _

There was Maple Street, the green and white sign bent sideways and shot with a paintball gun a few times. Rey turned right and jogged down to 1203, a half-derelict building of red brick with wrought-iron bars over the windows. Graffiti covered the walls, and trash drifted around the frozen, dirty slush puddles. This wasn’t exactly the nicest neighborhood, but it wasn’t the worst one she’d ever been in, either. She hustled up to the door and found the button for Unit 404. “Hello?” she called, pressing it. “It’s me, Rey, from the cleaning service? Can you hear me?”

There was no answer for a long moment, and then with a click the door unlocked. She pushed into a dingy lobby and found the stairs. The elevator was out.  _ Dammit, _ she thought, and began to climb, sweating madly inside her parka as the weight of the backpack pushed down on her. 

By the time she got to the fourth floor, she was hot, achy, and damp. “Fucking… landlords,” she panted, and found number 404. The zero was slipping off the door. She knocked. “Hello?” she called, trying to catch her breath, and realized belatedly she’d never caught the client’s name. “Sir?”

There was no answer. She tried the knob and it turned easily, so she stepped inside and shut the door behind her, blinking in the sudden dimness of the apartment. “Is, is anyone in here?” she whispered, feeling oddly as if she’d just broken into a church. “Hello?”  _ Oh, fuck me, did he die? _

“Rey,” came a tired voice from the far corner of the dark living room. She stepped in, shucking off her backpack in relief. “The… phone…”

“I’m here, hi, sir. Yes. I have a heater, I’ll just plug it in. Where’s the light switch? I can’t see—”

“Please don’t... turn on… the light,” he forced out, but it was too late: right as he’d said it, Rey had found the switch, cobwebbed with disuse, and flipped on the kitchen light. The fluorescents snapped and flickered like a rave, and she found an outlet, plugged in the space heater, turned it on, and turned around to see—

The pale orange fluorescents leaked their cold, heatless light into the living room, where something  _ huge _ was stirring slowly behind the collapsed, dirty sofa. Rey’s heart jumped into her throat and she backed up, bumping against the counter of the kitchen. A man’s torso was half-kneeling, it looked like, one hand gripping the arm of the sofa, but as he rose up she quickly realized that his lower body didn’t have legs at all— his waist melted into huge, black shining scales, each one the size of her palm, and he half-fell, almost army-crawling out, slow and sluggish, his thick, scaly lower body feebly trying to move. “Oh,” she said, trying to gulp her terror back down where it belonged. “Sh-shedding. You meant. You meant  _ scales.” _

“I’m stuck,” he mumbled, eyes fixed on the space heater. “Got it… down a foot. No more. Energy.” 

“I can help you with that. Hold on.” Rey brought the heater closer to him, set it down in the middle of the living room so that the reddish glow of the filaments cast a light over his upper body, and the man— snake-man?—audibly moaned, closing his eyes and laying himself down on one elbow, bringing the rest of his body out from behind the sofa to coil up in front of it. It rustled heavily over the dirty carpet.

She tried to catalogue exactly what she was seeing. His snake-half was enormous, as thick around as his waist— maybe about thirty-five inches around— but his bare, pale chest was even thicker than that. The scales from his waist to what seemed to be about a foot down his tail were gleaming, black as ink, but she could now see that a translucent, half-shed snakeskin was peeling off him from about his hip-area down, and below that line, where he’d gotten stuck, his scales were dull and dingy all the way to where he tapered off to his tail and ended. 

His human-looking half, in contrast to the snake part, was pale-skinned and thickly built, with a head of shaggy, thick black hair that fell into his eyes. What she could see of his face was long and high-boned, but for all his powerful build she could see that he had had a rough life: scars and discolorations marked his back, his shoulders, his chest and belly. Even his face had a gouged furrow through his right cheek, a ridge of scar tissue. Looking around as he warmed up, Rey could see that he’d been not so much living here as just existing: there were no personal effects in the whole apartment, and everything was in a state of disrepair. It smelled faintly of urine and blood. Her first instinct was to open a window, but she was afraid he’d freeze if she did.  _ Cold blooded! He’s cold blooded and there’s no fucking heat!  _ First things first, though. “Do you have a name?” she asked gently, going through her backpack and trying to find anything that would help her help  _ him _ shed his skin. 

“I was called… Kylo,” he said, eyes half-closed in the heat. 

“Kylo. Okay. I’m sorry I didn’t bring more heaters. I didn’t know you’d be so… big,” she explained tentatively.

“It’s fine,” he whispered. “I can heat up in… sections.”

“Good. Should I help you out of your, um, skin now, or wait until you’re warm?”

“It’ll be easier. When I’m warm.” He rolled over to his back, arms flopping to his sides as he basked in the heat, and Rey felt a stab of surprise: his face, exposed in the warmth, was strangely compelling. He had a strong, almost too-big nose above a full, crooked mouth, and his face was speckled lightly with moles— there were even a few nestled right by his dark, expressive eyebrows. The lines and dark circles beneath his eyes made him look older than she thought he might actually be, and he had a badly-groomed fluff of coarse hair sprouting from his chin, jaw and upper lip. “I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said after a long couple of moments. 

“You didn’t. I was just, uh. Startled. I’ve never seen anyone like you before.” Rey peeled off her parka and set it aside. “You look like you could use some food. What, uh. What do you eat?”

Kylo’s brows drew together, then rose up when he realized she was serious. “Anything,” he said. “Pizza?”

She grinned down at him. “Pizza. Sure. I’ll order us some.”

*

An hour later, Kylo had devoured one and a half large pepperoni pizzas with garlic bread while Rey watched in fascination, chewing on her own measly single slice. He ate with both hands, slightly hunched like he thought someone might snatch it away, or like he thought he’d never eat again, and he’d warmed up enough to get himself upright, which meant his bottom half sort of coiled beneath him, giving him a solid, thick base to prop his torso up on. The space heater had valiantly hummed away the whole time, warming the room to a balmy seventy-five degrees, by Rey’s company thermometer. She flipped on the bent living room ceiling light, which was full of bugs, and saw that in incandescent lighting, Kylo’s scales gleamed with a ruby-red highlight over the shining black.

“Okay. Let’s get this skin off,” she said, wielding her wire brush, then hooking it gently into the dead skin. “Can you pull forward?”

“You’re not strong enough to hold that in place for me,” he said, eyeing her up. 

She sighed. “I know I’m only five-seven, Kylo, but I  _ do _ make my living assisting nonhuman people in—”

His mouth twitched, and then she found herself flying forward, toppling off her feet as the strongest force she’d ever felt jerked the brush out of her hands. A single broad arm caught her before she faceplanted into the dingy carpet. “You were saying?”

“Jesus,” she gasped, righting herself. “How much do you weigh?”

“Five hundred and fifteen pounds. I’ve probably lost some. You know. Because of not eating for a long time.” A flicker of something uncomfortable passed over his face. “But I can lift about that much, or more, on a good day.”

“You’d be a hell of a furniture mover,” Rey told him, brushing off her jeans. “Okay. How are you going to shed?”

“I… hmm.” He turned slightly, his powerful snake-half rippling as he surveyed the living room. “I’d initially kind of… pinned myself under the sofa to rub it away, but it kept moving, and then it tore all the way to my new skin so I couldn’t find the edge, and then I didn’t have the energy to keep changing it. Plus, I’m having a hard time reaching. I can’t see very well in full light. Better in the dark.”

“I could try pulling it,” said Rey doubtfully.

“Pulling— as long as you’re gentle. You can’t just yank it off like a sock. It’s my skin.” Kylo’s dark eyes were slightly panicked. 

She raised her hands. “No, I understand. I can be super careful. I promise. I once had to yank a popcorn kernel out of a vampire’s fangs. Just let me know if I’m too rough and I’ll stop. It’s my job to help. I want to help.”

He appraised her nervously. “Okay.” The thick body rolled slightly, exposing his underbelly, which was segmented like an ordinary snake, only far bigger, and the same red color as the highlight on his scales. “See, right down... there?”

Rey flicked on her phone’s flashlight. About a foot below his waist, where the skin had stopped shedding, she could see an odd gap in the scales over a rather swollen, inflamed-looking part of his body, like a pair of small openings, close together. “Right here?” she asked, touching him lightly. He sucked in a quick breath and nodded tightly. “Oh, sorry. Those holes are sensitive?”

“They’re where my genitals are, so yes,” Kylo answered, sounding vaguely strained. 

Embarrassment flooded her face. “Oh, my god, I’m  _ so _ sorry,” she gasped. Her phone fell from her loosening fingers and bounced on the carpet, and she knelt to find it. “I didn’t, I didn’t know. Okay. Um. I’ll just get the skin loosened up there for you and, and—”

“It’s fine,” he said, slithering over to the sofa and settling down on it. It creaked, and she realized why it was falling apart. His weight and shape were so different from an ordinary human’s that probably everything in this apartment was inaccessible for him. “Don’t be embarrassed. Just… can you find the edge?”

Rey came back, shining the light down. “Can you hold this for me?” she asked, and he did, looking down at himself as she ran her fingers carefully over the place where his old skin had torn off right at the place where it needed to come up and peel. “God, it’s like looking for the edge of a roll of packing tape…” Her fingernail caught lightly on the invisible edge, and she scratched carefully. “There! I think I got it.”

“I think you did,” he said, eyes wide. “Just…  _ carefully _ get that edge up for me. Please.”

“I will. Hold on…” She snagged the free, papery skin onto her wire brush, and slowly tugged on the skin, easing the old off to meet the rest of the hanging, dead mess. Kylo stiffened under her hands, and she looked up to make sure she wasn’t hurting him, but he twitched vaguely, eyes distant. “Better?” she asked.

“Yes,” he gasped, and his lower body flexed automatically, a full-body contraction and expansion, and with a moan, he’d worked his old skin down another few inches. Rey stepped back to watch in fascination. Kylo slid off the sofa, pressing his lower body hard against the rough carpet, and gave another one of those strange full-body shudders, then another. With every squeezing movement, the skin slid off further and further, peeling back along his body like a cast in reverse of his skin, and it only took a few more minutes before he’d wriggled out of it, leaving it behind like an old jacket. “Oh, that’s…  _ so _ much better,” he whispered, twisting over. “Thank you, Rey.”

“What are you gonna do with the skin?” she asked, staring at it. Nine feet long and dusty-gray, almost pearlescent: it really looked awful.

“I didn’t think about that. It’s the first time I’ve ever shed… here.” He looked uncomfortable.

“Oh. Well, I can have it picked up later. We have a waste disposal team. Uh, how long exactly have you been here, Kylo?”

He backed away slightly, his torso tensing. “A few… months,” he said evasively.

“Kylo…” She took a deep breath. “It’s important to me, okay, as a professional, that you understand I’m here to help you. I’m not blind. I can see those scars all over you. If someone’s hurting you…”

“Nobody’s hurting me,” he said almost too fast to understand, swaying slightly. “Not anymore.” A shadow of pain flitted across his face, and he pressed a broad hand to the swollen area below his waist. “You… you should go.”

She shook her head. “You’re hurting. Something else is wrong. What is it?”

“It’s— embarrassing, I can’t— I can’t tell you.”

“I’m here to help, that’s my job—I’ve seen some crazy shit doing this work, Kylo, and I swear that whatever the issue is I’ll do my best to help y—”

“You can’t find me a female of my own kind, so no, you can’t help me,” he said, looking almost ill. 

That wasn't what she'd been expecting to hear. “A— a female?”

“Yes. It’s, it’s—” Kylo shuddered. “Warming up again kickstarted the whole thing. I was… supposed to— it’s a long story. Back in the late summer. I started…” He swayed on his thick lower body, at a loss for words.

“You started…mating season?” offered Rey, lost. What else would he need a female of his own kind for?

“Yes. That. I— I always became very aggressive when it— started, but before, there were drugs…” Kylo scrubbed a hand across his face. “I’m not good at telling stories.”

“That’s all right. Start from the beginning.” Rey crossed over and wiped off the counter, then shoved the pizza box into a bin. 

“In the cage. I had drugs in the cage.”

She blinked, shocked. “Cage? What cage?”

“The cage at the…” Kylo looked completely lost. “I don’t know what it’s called. People came to look at me.”

“Look at you in a cage? Some kind of, what, a travelling circus?” Rey was appalled. “Those are illegal— they’ve been illegal for years.”

“They owned me. I don’t remember a lot from before. But whenever mating season happened, and I started getting aggressive, they’d give me drugs to stop it. Except then I ran away in the summer and now I— I—” He shivered. “It’s so cold here. I had a big cage with a heating lamp there…”

“How did you run away?”

“Killed the man who owned me.” Kylo’s eyes flashed. “It was easy. He reached in to inject me and I snagged his wrist with my tail, just like this.” His tail, thin and tapered where it ended, lashed out like a whip and caught Rey’s arm so tightly that she gasped. “Yanked him into the cage. Strangled him. Stole the keys… using them was easy. I’d seen him do it a hundred times.” He released her arm, which tingled slightly. “And then I just... bolted off. Kept to the woods, but I was cold, and the city was warmer… radiant heat. Off the concrete. I tried to nest in here, because it’s half-abandoned… nobody cares much. Not even the hag down the hall. Nobody has to see me. I’d scare normal people.”

“Nobody should have treated you like that. You didn’t deserve it.” Rey stepped closer, feeling sympathy for him. “But why… why do you need a female?”

“I don’t know. I just— it’s instinct. This hurts.” He ran his fingers over the area where he’d said his genitals were, though Rey couldn’t see anything. “Like something has to... come out.”

Something clicked in her head: a word for the being in front of her, pulled from books. “You’re a naga!” she said, snapping her fingers. “Ooh, you’re rare, though. I don’t think we could find a female naga in the whole city. Hold on.” She darted over to her phone and quickly searched for a while on Wikipedia, frowning and mumbling as Kylo waited, silent. “Says here that depending on the sub-classification, male nagas sometimes… deposit gelatinous, large congealed sperm blobby things called  _ pila seminis _ inside a female’s cloaca that are then allowed to fertilize her eggs, then become, um, shelled eggs, laid and incubated by the female. That’s North American ones. African nagas can deposit sperm inside the female, which she can choose to expel or allow to fertilize  _ her  _ eggs that she makes _ … _ Indian nagas mate rather more like mammals do and give birth to live young…”

“I think it’s the first one,” said Kylo, slightly strained. “It just feels… inflamed.” His eyes were fixed on her, his breaths coming in soft, full gusts as his nose flared. “You smell nice.”

“Me?” Rey lifted her arm and sniffed. Her work shirt was soaked through with sweat, and it didn’t smell good to her at all, unless there was something about her that was only detectable by a naga’s nose. “Kylo, erm, what happens if you don’t find a mate?”

“Break something,” he muttered, eyes still trained on her. “Go berserk. Aggression. Have to… find. Help.”

“Can you not… well, to be crude, work it out by hand? By yourself?”

“No,” Kylo said, his throat bobbing. “Tried it in the fall, bad— bad idea. Nothing h-happened.”

Rey gulped. “Well, I’ve got no idea what sort of drugs they were feeding you, and I certainly can’t call anyone for advice. But if you, if— I might be able to, ah, help a little. If you— if that’s—I know a lot of non-humans think any kind of mating behavior with a human is super gross and unacceptable, but—”

His eyes widened in horror. “I can’t mate  _ you _ . I’d break you. You’re so tiny.” 

She huffed. “Well, look, Kylo, I can handle quite a lot, I’m not made of glass. Besides, you just said you’ll break stuff and lose it and get aggressive if you can’t get a mate and you’re  _ big, _ I don’t want the building coming down on everyone in it.” Rey crossed her arms. “It’s either this or let you nearly freeze to death and hibernate until spring, and even then the problem wouldn’t go away, would it?”

“No,” he admitted, staring at her.

“Okay. So you just— just tell me what I’ve got to do.”

He closed his eyes for a moment, as if he was trying to gather his thoughts. “You— you have to take off your clothes,” he managed, and if he’d been a mammal she was sure he would be blushing. “All of them.”

“Right, then,” she answered, and shucked off her clothes: boots, fleece-lined jeans, her long-sleeved work shirt with the company logo embroidered over the right breast, her thermal underwear and her bra and her underpants. Her wool socks were cozy, and wouldn’t get in the way of any other activities— plus she really didn’t trust the cleanliness of that carpet. “Is this enough?” she asked, shivering despite the warm air.

Kylo advanced, his lower half gliding along the floor. “Yes. Those…” His hands reached out to touch her breasts almost clinically, like he wasn’t sure what they were for. “Huh. Soft,” he said, and blinked heavily, inhaling the air by her. “Rey. If I hurt you, I’ll try to— to stop. I don’t… I don’t know what it’s going to be like.”

“Okay,” she squeaked, appalled at her own daring. This had  _ not _ been in the employee handbook. “I’ll let you know. Have at it.” He nodded in agreement and ducked his head slightly, weaving back and forth in an intricate little dance. Paralyzed with uncertainty, Rey stood there on the carpet naked except for her socks, and watched him. His mouth opened slightly as he neared her, as if he was tasting the air around her— then he withdrew, nose flaring. She wondered if he’d decided she smelled bad, but he came back again, leaning in, mouth open again.  _ Scenting me. He’s scenting me. _ If she was a female naga, she thought wildly, she’d probably be doing the same thing he was: swaying back and forth in some sort of mating ritual. So she did her best: leaned from side to side, mirroring him, keeping her eyes on him. 

Something gleamed in Kylo’s eyes: approval? Excitement? He circled her slowly, and she copied him, looking up into his face. Mounted up on that thick snake’s body, he was easily six foot six, but he lowered himself again, meeting her gaze, then quick as a flash he’d gotten behind her, a thick, solid coil of scales firmly pressed around her calves to pin them in place, and her back up against his chest. His skin felt room-temperature, but warmed where she touched it, and his arms came to circle her torso, holding her close as his chin bumped the top of her head.

Rey blinked. He bumped her again with the bottom of his jaw, and again, and she couldn’t help but giggle. Oddly, the more his chin and jaw pressed against her head, the better the place seemed to smell— and when he bent and pressed his cheek along her hair, emitting a gutteral little sound, she got a whiff of something  _ delicious.  _ Musky and masculine and warm. Almost sweet. Burnt vanilla-tobacco, fall leaves, a crackling fire. She inhaled deeply, trying to taste it on her tongue, and he rubbed his other cheek along her head, breathing a little harshly. “Smells... good,” she managed, halting and unsure. “Really good.”

He made an odd, pleased sort of clicking noise, and then she felt it, hard and heavy and thick against the small of her back.

Or, more accurately,  _ them. _

“What—” she twisted, trying to see, but couldn’t move due to the fact that his coils were pinning her bottom half in place and his arms had her top half secured. “Kylo. Kylo, wait.  _ Wait, _ what, what’s touching me?”

He loosened his grip on her arms. “My… penises?” he answered, throatily, like he was trying to pull himself out of a dream.

Rey almost choked on her own tongue. “Penis— _ penises?  _ You have  _ two penises? _ ”

“...Yes?” he answered, sounding exactly as bewildered as she felt. “You have two cloacal openings— I can feel them down here. What’s the problem?”

“Oh, no _ , no, no, _ ” said Rey, beginning to panic. “No, those aren’t cloacas— one of them is for reproduction and the other’s for, for, waste—”

It was his turn to sound shocked. “You— hold on, humans have  _ two separate tracts _ for waste and for reproduction? And they’re right next to each other?” 

“Well. Technically humans with  _ my _ particular arrangement have three: one for liquid waste, one for solid waste, and one for reproduction.”

Kylo slithered over to the couch, taking her with him. “Can I see?”

Rey could feel her face flaming. “Oh, my God— sure, I guess, if I can see your—”

He put her gently on the sofa on all fours and maneuvered her legs apart, ass up. She twisted her head around to look at him as he examined everything between her legs very carefully, with a tracing finger or two. “Which one is the one you use for reproduction?” he asked.

“The one in the—  _ not that one— _ yes, that one.”

“It’s wet,” he said, his thick finger sliding in. Rey caught her breath, gulping. He had very big hands, and her belly twisted in anticipation. “Oh, I see.  _ You _ produce lubrication. "How… deep is it?”

She closed her eyes. “Um. About… I think the vagina can deepen up to s-seven inches?”

Kylo sounded incredulous. “That’s  _ all?” _

Rey’s mouth flapped open and shut for a moment. “Well, what— let me see what  _ you _ have, and then we can work out how to make this work.” He released her, and she rolled over, sitting up just in time to see him rear back a little, exposing everything below the waist. She was silent for a moment. “Oh,” she said, very strangled. “Right. I see the problem now.”

The twin appendages jutting out of the smooth, segmented underbelly, a foot below where skin ended and scale began, were both at least fourteen inches long, eight inches around, dark scarlet, slick-shiny, and looked  _ nothing _ like a human penis. Sure, they were smooth along the shaft, but that was about where the resemblance ended— instead of a smooth, round end, these ended in segmented flaps, closed tightly against the air of the room.  _ Where the fuck am I going to put those things?  _ Kylo looked like he was waiting for her to tell him what to do. At a loss, she reached out to touch the slickly wet, smooth skin of the left one, and he recoiled, shuddering. “Don’t,” he rasped, his penis half-retracting back in. “Too much.”

“Sorry.” So a handjob was off the table. Rey braced herself. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think you should probably put it in my ass.”

“Your waste tract, you mean? How deeply can you—”

“Pretty damn deep, as long as you’re careful,” Rey said, trying not to clench her ass in terror. It had been ages since she’d done anal. “You’ll have to— there’s a whole human, uh, ritual with that. You have to relax me. Get me warmed up. And use a lot of lubricant, and be slow, and gentle.”

“I can do that.” Kylo was coming back, intent and focused again. “Both of them in there, or—”

She tried not to flip over the back of the sofa at the thought of sixteen solid inches of monster cock in her ass. “Just. Just the one. I think. Maybe fit part of the second one into the reproductive tract? Which one pops out those pilar seminal— pill— the sperm ball things?”

“I don’t know,” he confessed. “I just feel like once I’m inside you, they’ll come. Like I’m about to explode.”

“Okay. If you want to hold me again and, and do what we were doing before, you can do that.” Rey belatedly realized she’d forgotten to call Rose, and closed her eyes as Kylo’s scent descended on her again, his tail gently, firmly coiling tight around her knees and calves as he held her against his front, her head nestled under his chin, his hands alternating between holding her close to his chest and stroking slowly down her sides. It was nice, very relaxing, and she let herself sag a little, confident he could hold her deadweight if he had to. “Mm,” she mumbled.

“I’d make you a nest,” he whispered, his voice gone throaty and warm again. Dreamlike. “Nest. Safe. Nobody would find us to hurt us…” He grunted, his hips— or what were supposed to be his hips— bumping against her softly. She felt the wet, warm tip of a cock pressing against her ass, and thought,  _ if the male nagas have lubricant that explains why he was so surprised at me having it _ before he’d pushed slightly, breaching her a little. It burned a bit, the muscle there not used very often. She whimpered. Kylo gripped her more firmly, hands shaking. “Tight,” he moaned, and pushed a little further. It didn’t hurt, but it felt odd.  _ I should have had an orgasm first,  _ she thought wildly, clutching at his hands. 

“Kylo,” she whispered, trying to breathe. “Let me, can you, can you hold me up while I t-touch myself?”

“Touch yourself where?” he asked, uncertainly, shifting his hands already to give her access. 

“Here,” she gasped, and rubbed the heel of her hand awkwardly across her clit, shivering. “Fuck. I just, if I can just come, it’ll be better—” 

“Here?” His left arm clung to her tightly, keeping her pinned to his chest, and his right hand reached down, pawing at her clumsily. “Where the hole is?”

“In front, up by—” The pads of his thick fingers brushed against her clitoris, and Rey stiffened, moaning. “Yes, yeah, do that again but f-faster—”

“I can feel you around me,” he whispered, sounding awed, and obeyed her directions, working away at her clit until she was tense, shuddering— and released, warmth soaking her from the bottom up, limp and moaning in his arms. “I felt that. What— I felt that. Rey, what  _ was _ that?”

“Or-orgasm,” she panted.

“You’re easier to—” He pistoned his hips softly, breathing hard, and she let out a low, animalistic moan as he seated his left-hand cock inside her, all the way to the hilt. “Tight around me,” he mumbled, nosing into her hair. “You took it. All of it. Good. Oh, you’re tight here.” But he wasn’t fucking her, wasn’t pushing his hips in and out: instead, his cock was twisting slightly inside her, moving like it had a mind of its own. 

It still wasn’t enough. Rey squirmed a little in his grip. “Put. Put the other one in m-my pussy, please, just a little, just fill it up,” she begged, hair stuck to her forehead with sweat. “I want, I w-want it—”

“Here,” he panted, and slid her down forward until her ass was in the air, his second cock slipping into her cunt slowly, slowly, so as not to hurt her. “I’ll stop when I find the end. Oh,  _ Rey, _ this one’s so w-wet and hot. Elastic, too. You’re so warm.”

“B-better than the space heater?” she panted, gripping the forearm that pinned her to a thick, wide chest.

“So— s-so—” He seemed to be losing the ability to speak clearly. In a quick flash, he’d curled back around her, positioning himself so that both of his cocks were jammed as deeply as possible, and let out a shaking breath. “Not. Long. Take it all. Good— good girl.”

Rey let out a thin little wail and wriggled— she wanted  _ friction, _ heat and kissing and fucking, and this just wasn’t enough— but in the next moment, his mouth had found her neck, his teeth gripping her in a gentle, firm bite. “Ohhh,  _ Kylo _ —”He didn’t answer, except to make a few soft clicking noises in his throat, deep down, and then she felt his body tremble lightly, and something that felt almost solid swelled, moved, and pushed past the already- stretched ring of muscle where his first cock had entered her body. “ _ Uh, _ ” she moaned unintelligibly, and clung to his arm as he shuddered. “What was th—”

He made another series of clicking sounds, breathing hotly down the side of her neck, and another nearly-solid thing slid down his cock to her ass, working slowly to get past her body’s boundaries. She squirmed, panting, and looked down, which she hadn’t thought to do all this time, and saw that her lower abdomen, normally more or less flat from all the running and wrestling she had to do on a daily basis, was distended, as if she was PMS-ing, or maybe had gas. “Ky—” The second object slid into her body as Kylo grunted, and this time she could feel it leaving his penis, nestling alongside the second one as her gut stretched slightly to accommodate it. “Fuck— how many more of those are you gonna—”

He growled, somewhere deep in his chest, and she knew the answer innately: as many as he had saved over the past months, after he’d made his escape. Rey breathed as deeply as she could, speared on both of his cocks, and closed her eyes: she wanted to come again, badly, but she didn’t think he’d be able to let her get a hand free at the moment. “Hey, I wanna come,” she whispered, shaking. “I need—”

The cock halfway inside her vagina moved, then began to slide back and forth, sending jolts of delightful friction, finally, from her thighs to her scalp. “ _ Uhhhh uh uh ah aaah,  _ Kylo, Kylo  _ fuck _ yes don’t stop doing that, don’t, I— I—” Her second climax smashed into her as she trembled, her body taut, and as she came down, loose and pliant, his other dick put three more whatever-they-were-called’s inside her in quick succession, which seemed to be exactly as pleasurable for Kylo as the orgasm had been for her. His breath came in huge, shaking gasps, and his body twitched, but the other cock slid out of her vagina. 

“Too m-much,” he forced out, mouthing at her bare neck. “S-sorry—”

“Don’t, don’t be, it’s fine, it w-was good—”  _ I have to keep track of those sperm ball things, I have to make sure they all come out afterward. Five. I have five now.  _ Rey trembled a little as Kylo lowered her to her knees, keeping his arms around her and his tail firmly wrapped around her left leg as he breathed like a man who’d just run a marathon. Her freed right leg felt cold, and she braced her sock on the carpet as he took a few minutes to gather himself, then grunted and pushed another past her ass.

_ Six. _

Seven, eight, and nine came slowly, and after number nine she was struggling to breathe deeply enough. A glance down brought a flush of embarrassment to her cheeks: her gut was stuffed so full that she was bulging from her pubic bone to her navel, and her skin was prickling. “Kylo,” she forced out, wheezing. “I can’t breathe.” It felt as if she was crammed up to her diaphragm, her lungs unable to expand enough to draw a full breath— and that was in addition to the enormous cock wedged into her body. “I can’t…”

“Two. More.” He sounded as if he was about to come apart at the seams. “Please.”

“Promise?” she gasped.

“Promise.”

She could handle it. She could do anything as long as Kylo just kept hold of her, didn’t let her go. “Okay.”

He bent down a little, angling her so that the weight of her belly was pointing at the floor and not on her insides, and braced himself against the sofa with one broad arm. “You. You can,” he mumbled, and she felt another pass her body, shove itself into her gut with the others. “ _ Oh. _ You’re so g-good. You can take the last one. All for you. Please. You can do it.”

_ I can do it, I can do it.  _ “I  _ can _ , I can do it,” she croaked, and the last one slid into her. Kylo gasped in relief and Rey pressed her sweaty head against the matted old stained suede sofa. Triumph coursed through her, weak and pale, but triumph anyway. 

“You did it,” he panted, gripping her tight with shaking fingers. “You did it. Good. So good.”

Rey could only manage a high-pitched whine as he released her leg and laid her down gently on the carpet, curling his body around her to make a sort of nest. Her belly had a cramp stinging along the right lateral muscle, and breathing felt like the hardest thing she’d ever had to do. She couldn’t even draw her knees up properly, but lying on her side took the pressure off her gut. He felt warm to the touch, and as he withdrew his cock from her backside, it felt easier to breathe by a little bit: there was some space left behind. Her legs felt like jelly. “How long,” she croaked. “Until...”

“Soon.” His enormous hand rubbed soft and careful into her swollen left side, and she closed her eyes, savoring the way he rubbed her cramp away. Pride colored his voice. “I don’t even care that you’re not like me. Good mate. Perfect.”

“I look like I’m five months pregnant,” she muttered, trying not to think about how delightful his words were. “I—” she caught her breath, trying to find the energy to speak after a whole full sentence, “expect female nagas have a bit more space in their, their cloacas.” 

“I don’t care,” Kylo whispered, nuzzling her ear. “I like it. I’ve never seen a human like this before.”

She shivered happily, basking in his approval, his pride. “What, pregnant?”

“No, relying on me. Trusting me.” His voice wavered a little, and he raised his head to look down at her. “You trusted me to do this to you, when I called  _ you _ for help, Rey. You trusted me… and I pinned you down and pumped you full of—” Kylo cut himself off. Tears glimmered in his eyes. “You can’t even sit up on your own. And you still trust me. You’re not afraid of me, you’re not hurting me. I could have killed you.”

“But you didn’t.” Rey reached up and stroked his lower half gently, feeling him shudder beneath her cheek. Dry, warm, firm scales. She could have lay there forever but something rumbled dangerously in her gut, a sharp pinching cramp shooting through her. “Actually, I think you need to help me up. Where’s your bathroom?”

*

Kylo, scrolling on her phone and reading off medical journal articles, informed her through the door that if she’d been a female naga, the  _ pila seminis _ would have been absorbed into her body naturally. That didn’t make Rey feel much better as she pulled her left leg up awkwardly to half-squat on his toilet, grimacing as gelatine-like clear material squelched out of her ass in varying forms of solid: some felt just like they had coming in as they did going out, round, oblong gobs of semen. Others were partially dissolved. It didn’t hurt much, it was just annoying and a bit weird. Part of her was worried that she wouldn’t be able to get all of it out before she had to go back to work. 

“What if I’m just walking down the street and suddenly I leak all this stuff everywhere through my clothes?” she called, flushed.

Kylo didn’t answer, and when he did, he sounded oddly throaty. “Um. I guess you’d m-make a mess,” he said, and Rey toed open the door to find him staring at her: dark eyes widely dilated, mouth open. 

“You’re into that, huh?”

“I, I—”

She grinned. “Oh, my God. Is that some kind of a, a naga fetish? Your mate can’t absorb all the globs of sperm because you were just  _ so _ virile and while she’s going about her everyday business later on she’s leaking it everywhere, making a mess—”

Kylo’s tail coiled up tightly, the tip vibrating. His eyes looked glassy. “You’d have to hide it, cover it,” he forced out, “or everyone would know, everyone would see, know you’d fucked a m-monster.”

“You’re not a monster,” she said softly, taken aback. “I mean, not in the derogatory sense of the word—”

“I’m a  _ thing,  _ I’m not even—”

“The man who had you in captivity was the real monster, Kylo, not you.” Rey really wished they weren’t having the conversation from a bathroom while  _ pila seminis _ glopped wetly out of her sore butt. “You’re a person.”

“No, I— I know. That’s not what this is about,” he said awkwardly, his chest expanding and deflating like a huge, pale bellows. 

She blinked, flushing. “Oh.  _ Oh.  _ Right. Yeah, okay, they’d know I fucked a monster. And if anyone knew about it, I— it would be, just, just humiliating, and awful. I mean, what if none of this stuff came out of me, and then I had to go back to work with my stomach all—”

Kylo visibly shuddered and leaned against the doorframe, his tail still coiled and shaking like a spring. “ _ Fuck, _ ” he gasped, and before she could do anything, his penises slid out, slick and pink and ready to go again. 

Rey felt her face glow with heat. “Oh, no, I didn’t— I don’t think I can—”

“No, you sit there. I can do it myself now, there’s nothing built up in the glands, not oversensitive anymore. I’m just— really aroused,” he explained thinly, and Rey watched in fascination as he sank to the floor, his back against the wall in the hallway, his cocks thudding heavily on his upper belly as his eyes took over a glazed appearance. “I’d keep you hidden. Just me. Just us. Nest. I’d build a nest— _ uh—” _ Both hands reached up, sliding lightly over his penises as his body jerked and undulated. “Rey—”

The words came tumbling out of her mouth. “I’d be yours, you’d be my monster, my secret, nobody would know, you could stay warm with me in your nest every night…”

Kylo made an odd, keening, torn sort of sound, and clear, thin liquid spilled across his belly and scaled lower body as he sucked in a few deep breaths, resting his head against the wall. “Sorry,” he said when he could speak, raising his head again and looking right at her. “About all of this. I’m sure… about half of that wasn’t actually part of your job.”

“You know, I actually didn’t mind it that much,” Rey told him, standing and tugging her underwear back up. Her legs still ached, and her asshole felt sore and weird, but that would go away. “Here’s what I’m going to do, okay? I’m going to call one of our networked social helping agencies and send someone out to get you squared away with a place that’s accessible for you. And they’ll find you a therapist. Someone to talk to who can help you a little bit.”

“I can’t… I can’t just go around outside,” he said, looking stunned. “I’ll be— people will—”

“Have you seen yourself? People will think you’re the most gorgeous thing they’ve ever seen,” she said firmly, crossing the bathroom threshold and kneeling by him. “Nobody’s going to hurt you. And if you feel left out, there’s a Rare Creatures Anonymous group that meets every other Thursday down by the park, in the old Rotary Club building. There’s a kludde and an amarok, and a couple of nixies. I bet they’d love to meet you.”

He swallowed nervously and looked up at her. “I’ll need clothes.”

“No problem. I know a company that specializes in merfolk clothes. They’re cold-blooded, too, and don’t have legs. I’m sure they can size up some things for you.”

Tears filled Kylo’s eyes. He wiped them away. “You really— think so?”

“Yes. I told you, this is my job.” Rey took his hand in hers: she needed both hands for it. “Do you believe me?”

He sniffled and nodded. “Thank you.” he managed, and she leaned forward to hug him. Kylo didn’t seem to understand the gesture, but quickly returned it, cradling her gently. “You’re very kind. Kinder than I deserve.”

“Well, that’s why I have this job. I like helping people.” She pressed a kiss to his cheek and stood up, wobbling back to the living room. He followed eagerly, the hissing slide of his scales on the carpet a continuous noise. 

“And engaging in mating behavior with clients is… part of your job?”

“No! No. Not— no. You, uh, you’re the exception there. I don’t think that’s ever come up before,” she explained hastily, tugging her clothes back on. “Ever. Oh, God. Please don’t bring that up when you leave your review.”

“I mean, it  _ was _ very helpful,” he said, a wicked gleam of humor in his eyes. 

“Kylo,  _ no. _ ”

“Not even an  _ employee put herself at great risk of death by mating to—” _

She covered her eyes with her hands, fighting not to laugh. “NO!”

“Fine. I’ll settle for tipping you.” He slid over to a hole in the wall and pulled out a wallet, dusty and worn. “I don’t have electronic payment… anything, set up. Cash okay? How much do I owe you for the job?”

“For the shedding? Um, that’s a fifty dollar flat fee, hourly.”

“Fifty,” he mumbled, and counted out two twenties and a ten. “And for the mating help?”

“I— I— you don’t need to pay me for that,” she stammered. 

“Okay. Hourly fee for anything. Fifty?”

“Sure, I guess—”

“You’ve been here for another hour, so,” he said, and counted out fifty more dollars. The wallet looked absurdly tiny in his hand, and Rey unconsciously took the money. It smelled vaguely of old burnt popcorn and sawdust. “And then a tip for service, right? Um. A hundred dollars, I think, should cover it.”

A  _ hundred dollar tip?  _ “I really—”

He pressed a much-folded bill with Ben Franklin on it into her inert hands. “Please. It’s not my money anyway, and it should go to someone who deserves it.”

Rey caught sight of the driver’s license inside the old wallet as he closed it. Just a flash, really: a sour-looking old man, bald and scarred. “That belonged to the man who owned you, didn’t it?”

“Yeah. I took it. He didn’t need it anymore, and I was hungry.” Kylo looked guilty for a moment. “Stealing’s wrong, I know, but…”

“He stole your whole life from you. I think we can call that fair play,” she said, hoisting her backpack up. “Right. You keep the space heater, don’t let anything catch fire. I’ll explain the situation at work. Hang in there, okay?”

Kylo glided closer. “Thank you,” he said again. “For everything. That thing you did earlier, with your mouth— is that a way humans show affection? I used to see people do it to each other a lot, when I was—” his lips pressed together and he looked away, as if old, painful memories were resurfacing.

“It is, yeah,” said Rey. “It’s called a kiss. You can do it anywhere, but the mouth’s normally for, um, mates. Partners, I mean. And the cheek can be for friends or family, or a partner.”

Kylo bent low, his powerful body coiling under him, and kissed her firmly on the mouth. It was a little clumsy, but it sent heat through Rey anyway. “Are we… partners now?” he asked, sounding hesitant. “I’d like that. If— if you—”

“I’ll leave you my number,” she managed, flustered and scrambling for a piece of paper. “Text me if you need anything before the social worker arrives, okay? Or after that. Any time, really.”

“I will,” he said earnestly, smiling. His teeth were slightly crooked, a bit long, with pointed eyeteeth and slight gaps that gave him an endearing, boyish look. “Yeah. Thanks, Rey.”

“There.” She pushed it into his hands. “And I’ll be seeing you again soon, okay?”

“Okay.” He followed her to the door and let her out, stealing another kiss on the way, and shut it behind her with a longing look. Rey turned around in the hall and let out the world’s longest breath, her ears ringing, her belly sore, her asshole aching.

_ I just fucked a client on the clock, oh my God, I’ll be fired if anyone— _

“Can you keep the racket down next time?” croaked the hag down the hall, peering out of her door with a sour expression, her grizzled hair in curlers. “Some of us are nocturnal, you know.”

Rey jerked to her feet. “Sorry, ma’am. Have a nice day.”

“Hmph. Glad that boy found someone to see to him.” She lit a cigarette, watching Rey with beady dark eyes. “You be careful, girl. It’s icy out there.”

“Thanks, I will.” Rey ducked her head and tiptoed down the stairs, her heart threatening to beat out of her chest as she entered the light of the icy winter morning again, and yanked out her phone. 

Rose picked up on the first ring.  _ “Rey!? Where the hell have you been?” _

“I’ll tell you, but holy shit, Rose, you’re not gonna believe a single word of it.”


End file.
